October 2010, Austin, Texas
I was that girl going alone to an adoption conference as a single graduate student.
On my first afternoon in Austin, I drove to Mount Bonnell, a lookout high above Lake Austin. With my camera, I climbed the stairs to the top and found a spot for me and my thoughts. It was quiet and calm (and hot).
I was so nervous and uncertain. Would I stick out? Was this even worth my time and money? Was I crazy to think adoption would play a role in my life?
But I couldn’t shake the belief that God has given me this passion for a reason. Though that reason was still so obscure…
Was I supposed to work in the field of adoption? Was I supposed to live overseas devoting my days to caring for kids in an orphanage? Was I supposed to adopt as a single person? Would I get married and become a foster parent?
I definitely wanted answers, and I had travelled to this conference hoping it would provide clear direction for my life and teach me what to do to prepare.
But then I was reminded of something I’ve struggled to believe my whole life while up on that mountaintop. In the quietness and the calmness with the sun slipping below the horizon, I sensed God telling me this: I will take care of it. I will direct your steps. Just prepare.
The conference didn’t answer my questions, of course, because only He can. But it did increase a passion and desire I thought I maybe had to an undeniable this-will-be-part-of-your-story degree.
Like so others times in the Bible, God met me on the mountaintop. He reminded me of a Truth I know but struggle to believe. And here I am today, still listening to Him say: I will take care of it. I will direct your steps. Just prepare.
Got teary writing this one! This conference was four years ago this weekend and a few days after I met Dan for the first time.